Keep partners out of the draw

Secret Santa generator to exclude couples

Want everyone to buy for someone other than their partner? Add your group's names, then block each couple in both directions before creating the event. Drawing and revealing names are free, with no email or signup required.

Two rules per couple
Alice → Ben and Ben → Alice are separate exclusions. Add both to keep partners apart.
No self-matches
Self-matches are already prevented. Each successful draw assigns one recipient to each giver.

See the six-person example Before-sharing checklist

Create Your Secret Santa Event

No email required - just add participants and generate matches!

Illustrative example

Six people, three couples, six exclusions

Imagine Alice and Ben, Chloe and Diego, and Emma and Finn joining the same exchange. Enter all six names on separate lines. Open “Add Exclusion Rules” and select these pairings:

Alice and Ben

Block Alice → Ben and Ben → Alice.

Chloe and Diego

Block Chloe → Diego and Diego → Chloe.

Emma and Finn

Block Emma → Finn and Finn → Emma.

One possible result

Alice gives to Chloe; Chloe to Emma; Emma to Ben; Ben to Diego; Diego to Finn; Finn to Alice.

Everyone gives and receives once, and nobody draws their partner. This is an illustration, not a saved event or a promised result. Your random draw may be different.

How to enter the rules

Enter at least three distinct names. If two people share a first name, add an initial or another label so the group can tell them apart.
Open “Add Exclusion Rules.” Under “Alice should not give to:” check Ben. Under Ben's name, check Alice. Repeat for every couple.
Check the active rules shown as arrows. Each arrow means “must not give to.” Use its remove button or uncheck the box to undo a rule. Review rules again if you change any names.
Add a budget and exchange date if needed, then create the event. If a draw succeeds, share the resulting link directly with participants. Each person enters their name to reveal their match.

When no valid draw is possible

Consider a three-person group: Alice, Ben, and Chloe. If Alice and Ben cannot give to each other, both can only give to Chloe. Because Chloe can receive only one gift, this set of rules has no valid draw.

Add another participant with compatible rules, or ask the group whether one of the exclusions can be removed. More generally, avoid leaving someone with no possible recipient or forcing several people to share the same sole recipient. Repeatedly drawing cannot solve an impossible set of rules.

A failure message alone does not prove impossibility: the generator makes a limited number of random attempts. Review your rules before deciding whether to retry or change them.

Before you share the event link

Confirm the final participant list and use a distinct name for everyone.
Check that every couple has both exclusion arrows, with no accidental extra rules.
Agree on the budget, currency, exchange date, and how gifts will be delivered.
Tell everyone which name to enter and ask them to reveal only their own match.
Share the link only within your trusted group; name entry is not identity verification.
Keep addresses and sensitive details out of wish lists. Arrange delivery details separately.

Questions about exclusions

Does one exclusion block both directions?

No. Each checkbox prevents the named giver from giving to the selected person. For a couple, select the partner under each person's name: Alice must not give to Ben, and Ben must not give to Alice.

Can I exclude roommates or last year's recipients?

Yes. Add any pairing you want to avoid before creating the event. For last year's recipient, a one-way rule may be enough. The generator does not remember earlier events, so enter those rules yourself.

Does a failed draw mean the rules are impossible?

Not necessarily. The generator tries up to ten randomized draws. A tightly constrained but possible draw can still fail. Review the rules for conflicts; if they look valid, try again or relax a rule the group agrees is optional.

Can I change the participant list or exclusions after creating the event?

There is no event editor for changing the participant list or exclusions. Create a new event with the corrected names and rules, then tell everyone to use the new link. If people already revealed a match, make clear that the old assignments no longer apply.

Is entering a name a secure login?

No. The shared link and name entry do not verify identity. Anyone with the link can access event information and reveal a match under another participant's name. Share only within a trusted group and ask everyone to reveal only their own match.